DPW - Yorkshire's answer to the WWE

I'm a big fan of local wrestling. Nothing beats the being a few feet away from some indie wrestling, where even the most obscure chants can catch on.
Here's a match from a DPW event I went to in my home city of Leeds a few months back. I had my dog with me, and one of the wrestlers calls him out. Harehills Working Men's club is like the Madison Square Garden of Yorkshire for those who don't know.

Jeff and Matt Hardy shoot on CM Punk - An analysis

I came across this video on YouTube and decided to share it and add a bit of analysis. The video show Jeff and Matt Hardy shouting off about CM Punk. They both appear to be off their mash on ecstasy pipes... let’s take a look:



JH: What’s straight edge mean again? The first straight edge world heavyweight champion. I think Christian said it best... erm... CM Punk, I think you’re a nerd.

Ooh, big scary Jeff Hardy calling Punk a nerd! This is like when Michael Cole calls Danielson a nerd, it just comes across as really kiddie. I wonder if CM Punk is crying huge tears into his glass of Pepsi Raw? Crying until his tear-ducts burn because a drug-wreck called him a nerd... Crying like a child who’s been left in a supermarket... you can play by the escalators all you want kid, but your mum’s never coming back...

JH: I get cocky every now and then, say you pay to see me, you pay to see me, but... I made CM Punk a motherfucking superstar... and that’s a fact, Jack... and I went in like this {raises middle finger]... baaaaannng!

At this point Hardy has laid it all on the line, he made Punk into a superstar, a superstar who seems to have gained his fame from copulating with his mother. Hardy then makes reference to that time when he “went in like this” and all the sycophants that surround the Hardy’s went “ooooh” like they were eleven and someone said a swear near a teacher... “oooh... you’re naughty.” On a serious note, I’m not how one would go in like that, but it seems pretty creepy to me. “Baannng!”

JH: You can’t do that shit in your company anymore, but in this world [makes a triangle with hands], you can do it all we want to. You should follow me, you should listen to my preaching because it’s gonna get you through life; it’ll make you live life the right way.

From this, it would seem that Jeff Hardy believes that triangles are banned from the WWE. The reasons for this are not explained by Hardy, but one must assume that WWE fear lawsuits for the use of triangles (though they do have the rights to use the logically impossible square-circle). I think what Hardy is saying here is that if you follow Hardy, you will transcend geometry.

JH: Your way’s not the right way, brother. That’s what’s cool about planet Earth; we’re all different. If we were all like you, man, I would rather live on Pluto.

If we were all like CM Punk, then Jeff Hardy would rather live on a fictional cartoon dog? Now, I don’t want to come across as preachy, but if you’d rather live on a cartoon dog than in a world without drugs, then maybe it’s time to consider going straight. I’m not preaching, it’s just a suggestion.

JH: You [points to the cameraman], my friend, are way too cocky; inside and outside of the ring.

At this point I would like to know who is behind the camera? And why is the cameraman so cock inside the ring as well as outside? These questions are never answered.

JH: It’s kinda strange when you go up and see your homeboys at a show... you got guys like Undertaker coming up and saying “hey Jeff, how’re you doin’, man?” all these other guys going “hey Jeff, how’s it going for you, man, you alright?” [incomprehensible] CM never even say hello to me, never did, walk away [mumbles] I just leave [mumbles] fuck that guy.

Wow, Jeff Hardy is pissed off because someone who doesn’t like him at his old work place didn’t go over to him and pretend to like him. How insecure is this guy? I’ve worked at places and have hated people, that’s part of working in a place with other people in. He then descends into the mumbling grumpiness of an old wino, no doubt reaching down to can of Special Brew for a dirty swig once the camera cuts.

JH: I just have one message for CM Punk [raises both middle fingers], fuck you.

The way Hardy delivers his swears here reminds me of someone who has just learnt a naughty word and feels assured with himself that by its mere utterance, the recipient of said swear will not be able to fathom, nigh, comprehend a word of such power and magnitude.

JH: I made you the straight edge superstar that you are, and I still don’t believe that because I think you take Ambien to go to sleep motherfucker [laughs], that’s a prescription if you didn’t know it, so hey-woah.

So hey-woah, Mr Punk, you’ve been hey-woahed, baby. Whatcha gonna do now? I feel sorry for Punk: he’s been accused of having sex with his mother, of being banned from triangles, of making Jeff want to live on a cartoon dog, of taking prescription drugs; he’s been told to fuck him, and now, with the final nail, the final barb of poison, he’s been hey-woahed... Jeff, you’ve crossed a line.

We then cut to Mr Sleepy, AKA Fat “Matt” Hardy, who somehow manages to piece together these words of wisdom in the same way a retarded kid would piece together the entrails of dead bird, believing them to be a jigsaw puzzle.

MH: I have no idea what CM Punk’s deal is with Amy Dumas.

It’s pronounced dumb ass, dumb ass.

MH: But I do know [falls asleep......wakes up] he’s a very dramatic and very emotional. Anytime she finds herself in a tough spot, I’m the guy she calls.

... and this is why CM Punk is better than you.

Socko's week in wrestling

There was a lot to take in this week with Survivor Series and the fallout from that, so let’s take a quick look over this last week:

WWE Survivor Series:
The best way to look at this is to revisit my predictions:

-
“- Team Del Rio vs. Team Mysterio - Rey Mysterio, The Big Show, Kofi Kingston, M.V.P & Chris Masters vs. Alberto Del Rio, Jack Swagger, Drew McIntyre, "Dashing" Cody Rhodes & Tyler Reks.
Don’t watch Smackdown, so don’t care... flip a coin...
Del rio to win.”

So, the babyfaces won. Oh well. To be honest, this wasn’t a bad match. Drew McIntyre is possibly the most boring thing in WWE at the moment, but most of the others put on a decent match. I’m not sure what the WWE have against MVP, he got the biggest crowd pop of this match when he entered and yet he was quickly eliminated.
Match rating: ***


“- John Morrison vs. Sheamus
This match is stupid. Sheamus has been going after Santino for weeks, so he’s having a match with Morrison... who gives a fuck. Potential to be a half-decent match though.
Morrison to win.”
This was a really solid match, but I’ll admit that when I was watching it I was hoping that Triple H would do a run-in. There were some pretty innovative moves by Morrison in this one, but the ending felt a bit flat. Morrison won this one, so 1-1 on the predictions.
Match rating: ***½


“- 2 on 1 Handicap Match for WWE Unified Diva's Championship
Team Laycool (Michelle McCool & Layla) vs. Beth Phoenix
Don’t care about Divas...
The first one to win.”
I was wrong, but don’t care. I went to get a drink during this one. 1-2.


“- WWE United States Championship Match
Daniel Bryan vs. Ted DiBiase (w/Maryse)
This could be pretty good, but can see bullshit with Maryse. I’d like to see Danielson keep the strap.
Danielson to win.”
Danielson won and the match was great. I’ve decided that a dream match would be Danielson versus Angle, but I know that’s never going to happen. Just imagine how good that match could be? I think this match has put DiBiase up in my estimation: the guy can work. 2-2 on the predictions.
Match rating: ****


“- WWE Intercontinental Championship Match
Dolph Ziggler vs. Kaval
This could be the best match of the night, Kaval (Low-ki/Senshi) has been floundering a bit of late, so would like to see him win and have some matches with Danielson.
Low-ki to win”
It’s a shame that Low-ki is getting buried in the WWE. He didn’t get the title, and probably never will now . Though the match took a little to get going, it was truly excellent. There was one spot where Ziggler got kicked in the face pretty hard and his nose started bleeding. This was definitely the best match of the night. 3-2
Match rating ****½





“- WWE Tag Team Championship Match
Nexus (Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater) vs. Santino Marella & Vladimir Kozlov

Really? Is this the best they could come up with? TNA gives you Guns/Beer Money/Gen Me... WWE charges you to see Santino and the generic Russian guy versus the ones without personality who stand in a line with Wade Barrett wearing the same T-shirts. WWE tag team division is a complete joke, it really is.“
A joke with a bad punchline... this match was piss-poor and the Nexi retained. No prediction for this because I cared so little about this match.
Match rating: *



“- World Heavyweight Championship Match - Kane (w/Paul Bearer) vs. Edge
Who cares, will probably be less painful to watch the Kane/Taker... hope Edge wins.
Edge to win.”
This match was bullshit, Edge won, but then the decision was reversed. I didn’t realise they had Dusty Rhodes on the booking at WWE. The match itself was also awful. I’ve always thought that if you have the strap on a wrestling show, you should be able to put on a good match. How many good matches has Kane actually been in? No really, think about this. How many? Maybe his first few with Undertaker, maybe one or two decent ones when he was a dentist. This match was Kane by numbers, and shouldn’t have been on a PPV, let alone high card. Please fire Kane, he’s just rubbish. 2-4.
Match rating: *


“WWE Championship - Orton (c) vs. Barrett w/Cena as ref.
I’m hoping for a Cena heel turn and Barrett to take home the strap. I can’t stand Orton, the guy is as wooden as, erm, some wood and looks like one of the muppets (Beaker?). I can see a lot of bullshit going down in this match, maybe even a good few swerves, but I hope not.
Barrett to win.
(then Miz will cash in his Money in the Bank case)”

I got this one all wrong, Cena shoved Barrett at the end to allow Orton to get the win. The match was decent enough, it just wasn’t that great. I’ll admit that the ending took me by surprise (as it evidently did with Matt Striker who called that Cena was free, only to be quickly corrected by Lawler). As for the Miz, I was wrong... for 24 hours, at least...
Match rating: ***

So my predictions were way off on this. As a pay-per-view, this was a mixed bag. There were some stand-out matches, and some stinkers. The finale to the Cena/Nexus angle will be the biggest swerve in history (cue Cena in a match for a WWE contract as a masked wrestler at Royal Rumble.)

WWE Raw:
The fallout for Survivor Series and another decent Raw. There was another match with Danielson and BiBiase which was very good. There was also a long goodbye segment with John Cena which was probably one of the best babyface promos I think I’ve seen (he even called for the “Let’s go Cena/Cena sucks” chant.) Of course, this angle has no choice but to fail. Unless Cena is genuinely fired, or at minimum takes some time off, this could seriously damage Cena’s position. The promo ended with Cena walking out of the door... for good...
It was also good to see CM Punk on the announce team. At points he sounded very “broadcast journalist” offering quite a lot of generic play-by-play commentary. It was only when he started to allow his personality to come out that he became interesting. I hope that the WWE encourage Punk to be more of himself.
The main event of the evening saw a return match between Orton and Barrett, again it was a decent match which was won by Orton due to a run-in by... John Cena... the guy who had said goodbye and walked out of the WWE made his triumphant return on the same fucking night. Now I hope that this is a one-off, that this was Cena’s last bit of revenge against Barrett and only returns say when Barrett actually has the title. With Orton and Barrett both exhausted from their match, the Miz came in and cashed in his MiTB case and in now the WWE champion. Thank God the title has been stripped from Orton (even though it will blatantly go back to him at TLC.)

Next week is King of the Ring. I’m not sure why they still do this, but it means a 3 hour Raw, so who’s complaining. I hope they don’t have Kofi Kingston to win (King Kingston, eugh). I think a good heel character should win this, hopefully Sheamus or Del Rio, but we shall see. If I’ve learnt one thing from watch Raw recently it is that the storyline which would make most sense and make for better future programming isn’t the way they’ll go, so who knows?


TNA Impact:
TNA does not care about its international fans. The management are so focused on US ratings that they ignore the fact TNA Reaction isn’t aired in many places. This is why the main event, and the main angle of the show didn’t appear on Impact. So you watch the show on Bravo on a Saturday night. Most of the programme sucks, the matches are bad and the main event (a Survivor Series style elimination match, FFS) cuts off near the end and that’s it. UK viewers are say wondering “what the fuck was that? Where the fuck was the Dixie Carter stuff they’d be going on about all episode?” So I end up downloading it from an illegal torrent site so I can watch the fucking ending. I’ve said it before: why should I waste my time watching a show on TV that doesn’t even have the ending when I can download it for free and watch it all? It makes no real difference to me, but to the TV station, who is losing viewers week-after-week because they are choosing to just download it rather than watch it on TV, this just seems stupid. Advertising revenues go down with ratings, and I’m sure I’m not the only person getting sick of this. This just stinks of desperation on TNA’s part and is very short-sighted.
I watched some of Reaction and realised that it wasn’t worth my bandwidth. The elimination ended with a run-in by the NWO (Jeff Hardy) and Dixie Carter had an injunction for Hogan. Yeah! An injunction, wooo! FFS, are you serious? I can’t wait for the courtroom drama that will play out over the next few months. Who cares about wrestling when we can have courtroom drama? Maybe they could bring Judge Judy, maybe Hogan will be hit with a summons rather than a steel chair... oh dear.



On another note, just watched the Best of Tyler Black DVD by ROH, some awesome stuff on there.

Clip of the day: Shawn Michaels v Hulk Hogan

This one match is better than everything Hogan has done in TNA combined.

Clip of the day - Angry Fan

Sorry for the click-throughs, embedding is disabled.

Best of Angry Fan Vol. 1

Best of Angry Fan Vol. 2

BJ Whitmer meets Angry Fan

Clip of the Day: Samoa Joe vs Masato Tanaka

I never realised this match took place. A surprisingly slim (and even more surprisingly, blond) Samoa Joe taking on former ECW title contender Masato Tanaka. Fun fact: Joe used to use the Pedigree...

Clip of the Day: 2 Reasons to Love Kenny Omega

Socko's week in wrestling

WWE Raw

This week, Raw went old school, and it was pretty good. They had all the old graphics, music, format and colours of Raw from when it first started. It was just like a normal edition of Raw in terms of building up for Survivor Series and keeping with the usual storylines. There were a couple of matches where old wrestlers were squashed by the younger guys (Brooklyn Brawler and Sgt. Slaughter). They also had a few ‘legends’ come out without wrestlers, or do little skits. One skit which I though was genius was with Dusty Rhodes, IRS, the Million Dollar Man, Goldust and Cody Rhodes... you need to see it. A skit with the Iron Sheik was also brilliant. He seemed like he didn’t even know he was there and was shouting off... not quite so genius, but was still entertaining.
Rowdy Roddy Piper did his Piper’s Pit with Cena and Orton, and even though Piper’s looking pretty old these days, he’s still got it on the mic.
Highlight of the night was the Swagger versus Danielson match with Jim Ross on the commentary. I’m obviously showing my age because having JR on the commentary just sounded right. I thought that Michael Cole was brilliant during this as well, pouting like a teenager. Michael Cole as a heel, play-by-play guy works really well, and this segment was probably one of the most entertaining things Cole has ever done.



TNA Impact

I find you have to rate the quality of Impacts on a curve these days. In terms of the last few months, this wasn’t a bad Impact. They were focused on less storylines which gave room for more time for wrestling... but not much more...
The show opened with a slick video package with Jeff Hardy talking about how he’s the “anti-Christ of professional wrestling” and looking and sounding more and more like Raven (he’s even put on a couple of pounds). This was a classic case of style over substance and can only be described as absolute gash.
There was a promo by Ric Flair against Matt Morgan, this was pretty entertaining and actually led to a match later in the night... which as you can imagine wasn’t brilliant, but was pretty solid... before a run-in by Fourtune... throughout the promo Flair repeatedly referred to himself as God – not a God, but God. I hate to use logic here, but if we take the Christian doctrine of the Holy Trinity, whereby the Father (God), the Son (Christ) and the Holy Spirit (spooky ghost), are all properties of the same entity (i.e. God), then Ric Flair and Jeff Hardy should be theologically opposed... perhaps... but then I suppose Flair could be an incarnation of Yahweh, the vengeful God of the Old Testament... Flair should clarify what he means when he uses the word God in this context... erm... so with the run-in, we had a bit of argie-bargie, a bit of an altercation between the members of Fourtune and Douglas Williams... So Doug Williams is now out of Fourtune. This is excellent, it means now Fourtune’s name actually makes fucking sense, I also hope that a match comes of this at the next PPV between AJ and Williams, and hopefully they will give them 15-20 minutes... and a cage... and a ladder...
After the Flair promo we had a mixed tag match between The Guns with Velvet Sky and Jay Lethal, and Gen Me with Robbie E and Cookie... why they are having a manager wrestle after a few weeks of being introduced in beyond me... Becky Bayliss is hot, but she’s not a good worker by any stretch of the imagination... this match had some decent moments, but on the whole was a bit of clusterfuck. Robbie E got the win, which made no sense.
Next up was a segment with Jarrett and JB. You can tell that in recent months TNA have been trying to put over a “reality” feel to their programming, with lots of candid snatches of dialogue and shoots by the wrestlers. In this segment, Jarrett was haranguing JB to read out an elaborate introduction for him, and ended up bitch-slapping him. The scene was uncomfortable and awkward, and so worked very well – much better than a lot of the Bischoff/Hogan segments they’ve been doing recently.
Next up was Jeff Jarrett’s MMA exhibition. With Jarrett bringing out six students from his “dojo” and taking them one at a time to show them submissions. I actually found this segment pretty entertaining, even though as I’m writing this, it sounds like a sack of cack... the segment was interrupted by Samoa Joe (Not “SAMOAN JOE”, Hogan). A match between Joe and two of the anonymous ‘students’ lasted for about 20 seconds with Joe getting them both to tap out in quick succession. Jarrett ran away, and we will no doubt see a submission match at the next PPV.
I’m pretty hazy on the ordering here, but the next match (I think) was Jeff Hardy versus Raven. If Raven lost, he would be fired. With the EC2 angle being wound down, it’s no surprise that Raven lost. As much as I used to like Raven, today he looks out of shape and a bit of a drug-wreck. The match itself wasn’t bad, and had hardy win with a Twist of Fate followed by a Swanton for the pin.
There was a really dull promo between Rhino and Tommy Dreamer, which I can’t really remember aside from the fact that it nearly made me fall asleep. This also goes for 3D’s promo – as great as they are on the mic, this whole angle is rubbish. Bubba flips between face and heel every few weeks and its starting to wear a bit thin.
As I say, my order is all out of whack, but I’m pretty sure the next match was Mickie James versus Angelina for the number our contender’s slot. As Love didn’t get her rematch after she lost the title to Tara, I’m pretty sure she’s the de facto number one contender... but this is TNA and logic and consistency aren’t exactly top priorities. The match was pretty decent, Love looked really good in this match. James won and so she’ll be, erm, taking on Tara again at the next PPV... hmmm...
We then had a backstage bit with Angelina crying, who should show up but Winter? You know Winter; the one who’s been doing the Ultimate Warrior trick of appearing in a mirror? The one that only Angelina can see... and the cameraman... and the viewers... it seems that Winter is some kind of Eastern-bloc goth/witch lesbian stalker. I really cannot wait to see how long it takes for TNA to drop this one...
Next we had a match between Shannon Moore and Abyss. I can’t stand Shannon Moore, the guy is a spot monkey and I just hate his image/character/philosophy/wrestling style. This match was pretty dumb and ended with Pope become the Undertaker and magically appearing in a casket. I’m really confused by the casket, who’s casket is it? I thought it was Abyss’, but it seems that Taz thinks it is the Pope’s... I’m confused.
And the end the show we had the aforementioned Flair/Morgan match.
On the whole, this wasn’t a bad Impact. There were lots of short snappy backstage segments which is much preferred to the long-drawn-out conversations between Hogan and Bischoff. I still think that the TNA belt looks awful... truly awful...

WWE Breaking the Code: Behind the Walls of Chris Jericho DVD

Just a quick final note, Chris Jericho’s DVD is pretty awesome. The documentary segment is great, and has a lot of his best promos. The only negative thing about this is the fact that they spend far too much time plugging Fozzie. If you don’t know Fozzie, imagine the most generic rock you can... bingo! That’s what Fozzie is.
Of course, the best thing about the DVD is the two discs of matches. And because WWE owns the tapes to WCW/ECW/Smokey Mountain, etc, we get a good variety of matches.

“Cowboy” Chris Jericho vs. Lance T. Storm
Calgary, Alberta October 2, 1990
Alternate Commentary By: Chris Jericho & Matt Striker

The Thrill Seekers vs. The Infernos
Smoky Mountain Wrestling March 12, 1994

International Junior Heavyweight Championship Match
Chris Jericho vs. Ultimo Dragon
Japan July 7, 1995
Alternate Commentary By: Chris Jericho & Matt Striker

Chris Jericho vs. Cactus Jack
Hardcore TV March 12, 1996

WCW Cruiserweight Championship Match
Chris Jericho vs. Eddie Guerrero
Fall Brawl September 14, 1997

Mask vs. WCW Cruiserweight Championship Match
Chris Jericho vs. Juventud Guerrera
SuperBrawl VIII February 22, 1998

WCW Cruiserweight Championship Match
Chris Jericho vs. Dean Malenko
Nitro July 27, 1998

The Millennium Countdown Clock Expires
RAW August 9, 1999

Intercontinental Championship Match
Chris Jericho vs. Kurt Angle
No Way Out February 27, 2000

WWE Championship Match
Chris Jericho vs. Triple H
RAW April 17, 2000

WCW World Heavyweight Championship Match
Chris Jericho vs. The Rock
No Mercy October 21, 2001

Undisputed Championship Match
Chris Jericho vs. Stone Cold Steve Austin
Vengeance December 9, 2001
Disk 3

No Disqualification Match for the WWE Undisputed Championship
Chris Jericho vs. Hulk Hogan
SmackDown May 2, 2002

Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels
WrestleMania XIX March 30, 2003
Alternate Commentary By: Chris Jericho & Matt Striker

WWE Championship You’re Fired Match
Chris Jericho vs. John Cena
RAW August 22, 2005

Save_US.Y2J
RAW November 19, 2007

Intercontinental Championship Match
Chris Jericho vs. Jeff Hardy
RAW March 10, 2008

Ladder Match for the World Heavyweight Championship
Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels
No Mercy October 5, 2008

No Holds Barred Match for the Intercontinental Championship
Chris Jericho vs. Rey Mysterio
Extreme Rules June 7, 2009

Non-Title Match
Chris Jericho vs. Undertaker
SmackDown! November 13, 2009

World Heavyweight Championship Match
Chris Jericho vs. Edge
WrestleMania XXVI March 28, 2010

My favourite matches on here are versus Juventud Guerrera and Shawn Michaels. Most of the matches are 4 star + and is well-worth checking out.

That Clown from Outta Town - PWG One Hundred

I've wanted to see this PPV since I saw this promo. Finally, it's time...

This event took place in December 2009, but since hardly anyone watches PWG I'll try and keep this as spoiler free as possible.

LET'S DO THIS!

00:03- Wow, no fucking about - straight into the match. I'm impressed.
00:57 - It's Gen Me...with different names.
2:26 - Gen Me (aka Young Bucks) vs Cutler Brothers - I've heard of the Cutlers but not seen them in action, Young Bucks are awesome though
05:55 - I don't know what that was...kind of a suicide headscissors to the outside, I guess...but it was awesome
09:50 - This match is awesome
11:32 - Fucking hell, the youngest Buck just did an insane corkscrew dive from the top rope to the floor...he must be dead
13:54 - Great match, great finish - it sucks that so few people were there, it's even worse that so few people will ever see it.
14:06 - Next match, Scott Lost v Roderick Strong...I know nothing about either of these guys, names sound familiar though. Hopefully it'll be a decent match.
15:20 - Very fast paced match so far, and the moves seem pretty impactful...I like :)
19:56 - The match seems pretty one sided so far in Lost's favour...nice mix of high impact moves and extremely uncomfortable looking submission attempts
22:21 - Strong has momentum now...very violent style also...these guys look like they're actually beating the crap out of each other
27:36 - Another great match
27:55 - Next match, Bryan Danielson v Kenny Omega...should be good.
28:02 - I like how they go from one match straight to the next...no entrances, no promos, no fucking about - just wall-to-wall wrestling.
32:58 - Great start to the match, both guys are great wrestlers, and Omega's funny as hell too
36:40 - I love this crowd - Omega puts his hands up for a test of strength, and one guy yells "Don't trust him, his arm is sometimes a chainsaw"
42:25 - Holy shit, both guys were standing on their heads, hitting each other in the face - how is that even possible??
43:22 - Omega grabbed the mic...this match is pure comedy
46:23 - Now they're dancing around the ring together...this is awesome
47:46 - Moonsault from the second rope to the floor...
51:50 - What an awesome match...both guys are super talented, and the comedy aspects made it a joy to watch. Best match I've seen all year that didn't include Kurt Angle.
53:33 - Paul London v Joey Ryan...I like London, Ryan rings a bell...I seem to remember seeing him on RoH but I might be wrong...
1:12:05 - Pretty decent match. London was good, I didn't see anything particularly special from Ryan. He executed everything perfectly, but his moveset seems a little generic from that showing...
1:12:30 - 6 man tag, B-Boy, Candice LeRay & Scorpio Sky vs Austin Ares, Chuck Taylor & Human Tornado...the only one I've seen wrestle before is Ares, but I'm looking forward to seeing Human Tornado in action - his highlight reel is awesome so I'm interested to see how good he is in an actual match. Weird that one side has a woman and the other doesn't, usually in mixed tag matches both sides are mixed.
1:24:50 - LeRay is really good...she's getting her arse handed to her though
1:25:53 - Ares taking the piss out of Cena :)
1:27:29 - LeRay just did a belly to back suplex on Ares...except instead of grabbing him round the waist, she grabbed his nuts. Ouch.
1:28:18 - Taylor went for a baseball slide under the bottom rope, Sky trod on the rope and crotched him...I've never seen that before, inventive and funny.
1:29:35 - Pretty cool match, 6-man tags are hard to get right imo. Tornado was great, Sky was really good too, as was LeRay...but it felt like I didn't see much of anyone, they were tagging in an out so quickly that nobody got a good head of steam going.
1:29:57 - Tyler Black v Davey Richards...Black's name sounds familiar but no idea who he is, Richards is a complete unknown to me.
1:30:26 - Actually, I recognise Richards' face but I can't remember where from...I seem to remember him being a hard hitter.
1:33:20 - The crowd is still awesome. Kid: "You suck!" Adult: "No he doesn't!"
1:34:51 - I like Richards, he'll just do a totally normal move but it looks about five times as violent...even his punches look nasty
1:43:43 - Really cool match, Richards just looks violent as hell
1:44:07 - Sonjay Dutt v El Generico...Sonjay is fucking awesome, Generico has an awesome highlight reel - I'm expecting good things from this one
1:53:27 - Running backflip over the top rope to the floor from Generico...insane
1:58:36 - Brainbuster from the top turnbuckle, and he rammed his head into the turnbuckle itself...nasty
1:59:11 - Colt Cabana v Chris Hero for the title...
2:04:35 - Awesome exchange between Cabana and the kid in the audience...ended up with the audience chanting "This is awkward" after the kid made a comment about the size of Cabana's package...even the ref had to cover his laughter
2:06:29 - Awesome technical wrestling from both guys
2:18:37 - Really good match, it looked like he actually knocked him out cold with that finishing move

Decent PPV overall, the standout match was the Danielson Omega match but overall everything was pretty damn good.

The promo I linked to at the start is actually part of this show, not promoting this show...I really want to see the event they're talking about.

Survivor Series Predictions

As Survivor Series is almost upon us, I figured I’d do some predictions. This is probably most rushed PPV card ever, so it is obvious the WWE haven’t done a great job at building it up. Let’s do this...

- WWE Championship - Orton (c) vs. Barrett w/Cena as ref.
I’m hoping for a Cena heel turn and Barrett to take home the strap. I can’t stand Orton, the guy is as wooden as, erm, some wood and looks like one of the muppets (Beaker?). I can see a lot of bullshit going down in this match, maybe even a good few swerves, but I hope not.
Barrett to win.
(then Miz will cash in his Money in the Bank case)

- World Heavyweight Championship Match - Kane (w/Paul Bearer) vs. Edge
Who cares, will probably be less painful to watch the Kane/Taker... hope Edge wins.
Edge to win.

- Team Del Rio vs. Team Mysterio - Rey Mysterio, The Big Show, Kofi Kingston, M.V.P & Chris Masters vs. Alberto Del Rio, Jack Swagger, Drew McIntyre, "Dashing" Cody Rhodes & Tyler Reks.
Don’t watch Smackdown, so don’t care... flip a coin...
Del rio to win.

- John Morrison vs. Sheamus
This match is stupid. Sheamus has been going after Santino for weeks, so he’s having a match with Morrison... who gives a fuck. Potential to be a half-decent match though.
Morrison to win.


- 2 on 1 Handicap Match for WWE Unified Diva's Championship
Team Laycool (Michelle McCool & Layla) vs. Beth Phoenix
Don’t care about Divas...
The first one to win.

- WWE United States Championship Match
Daniel Bryan vs. Ted DiBiase (w/Maryse)
This could be pretty good, but can see bullshit with Maryse. I’d like to see Danielson keep the strap.
Danielson to win.

- WWE Intercontinental Championship Match
Dolph Ziggler vs. Kaval
This could be the best match of the night, Kaval (Low-ki/Senshi) has been floundering a bit of late, so would like to see him win and have some matches with Danielson.
Low-ki to win

- WWE Tag Team Championship Match
Nexus (Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater) vs. Santino Marella & Vladimir Kozlov

Really? Is this the best they could come up with? TNA gives you Guns/Beer Money/Gen Me... WWE charges you to see Santino and the generic Russian guy versus the ones without personality who stand in a line with Wade Barrett wearing the same T-shirts. WWE tag team division is a complete joke, it really is.

I suppose half of the matches I want to see, which will give me time to go the bar while some of the Socko writers go to watch the event at a bar...


I want to see these in a ladder match at TLC:

Greatest Promos Ever!: "the man of 1004 holds..."

This might actually be one of my favourite promos in wrestling ever. It was from when Chris Jericho was feuding with Dean "the man of 1000 holds" Malenko on WCW.

I miss Jericho when he was like this...





















...arm bar

Worst Characters Ever!: Glacier

When it comes to wrestling gimmicks, none leave me colder (geddit?) than Glacier. Glacier’s gimmick was that he was a martial arts guy, not in an MMA shoot style, but it in that really cheese-tastic exhibition style whereby a guy would stand there and do a series of moves for no other reason than to show that he can do a series of moves (I think it might be called Kata, but I might wrong).
From April 1996, promos for Glacier started appearing on Nitro, they were very cryptic at first, but then he was finally revealed after about 4-5 months to be... Glacier – the Sub Zero of WCW.
Glacier’s entrance involved the house lights dimming and blue laser beams being shot across the crowd, the awful, awful music played and it would, erm, start to snow. I’m not kidding, fake snow would fall from the ceiling. At this point Glacier enters looking exactly like Sub-Zero did in Mortal Kombat 2 (when he was given a waistcoat and funny face-paint to differentiate him from the array of generic ninjas of varying colours). According to the ring announcer, his outfit has an evil face on his back because he knows that evil is always behind him, and he wore a helmet which was over 400 years old! No really, even though it looked new, it was actually handed down from his sensei.
After Glacier’s long-drawn-out entrance (it usually took about two or three minutes after he did all his fannying about in the ring, he would bow to his opponent and then bow to the referee. With the house lights still an eerie shade of blue and the snow still falling, the match would begin.
Glacier sucked in the ring. There’s no better way of putting it, the guy sucked. In his matches he utilised his martial arts to do some pretty looking roundhouse kicks and some stupid take-downs.
I can’t emphasise enough just how shit this gimmick was; with all its build-up, high production values (over half a million dollars were pumped into the production of his entrance), and hype, you’d think that he’d at least be half decent... you are wrong, you are so wrong.

Best of Youtube - Mexican Wrestling Tribute

Since it's been so quiet around here lately, I've decided to go through my favourite Youtube videos and post all the ones related to wrestling here. Hopefully the other contributors to this blog will join in too, and we'll all get a fuckton of awesome wrestling clips.

Today's video is a tribute to Mexican wrestling. Sorry the video quality is so low, this would be awesome in HD but this is about as good as it got in 2007 when it was first uploaded. While the video quality is bad, the quality of the wrestling is...well, judge for yourself.

Ultimate Warrior's Confession

I stumbled across this gem on Youtube...where else?

Socko's week in wrestling

As the blog seems to have gone a bit by the wayside recently, I’ve decided to summarise the weeks highlights in my own wrestling experience.

TNA Turning Point.

I thought that this was a very strong PPV which seemed to dip in quality near the end. I really enjoyed the Guns/Dudleys match. The Lethal Robbie match was pretty dull, there was some good spots, but Robbie E’s style is very WWE. Tara versus Mickie James was pretty decent for a Knockouts match, and really showed how much better the style of women’s wrestling is in TNA compared to WWE. The RVD/Dreamer match was an absolute car-wreck and should have been stopped after Dreamer’s wrist was clearly dislocated. Dreamer has this old-school mentality that the show must go on, and ended up doing some crazy shit (like a jumping piledriver and getting crotched with a ladder) with his hand half hanging off. It was nasty to watch. The Fourtune/EV2 had some pretty good moments, but wasn’t a great match, Raven looked an absolute mess and did nothing for the whole match. Sabu ended up getting pinned and then fired as a result. Flair gave a classic Flair promo to Sabu about him hating the Sheik, really funny. The Abyss/Pope match was pointless and dull. The Hardy/Morgan match showed that Morgan is mid-card at best and really can’t perform at the top level. That should have been Joe or Angle in the ring, not Morgan.
As expected the Immortals swept the board at this one, and I’m pretty sure that all of their matches had at least some NWO-style shenanigans.

The Shore.

Though I’m still not convinced by Robbie E’s in-ring ability, The Shore’s gimmick is pretty strong. In a week when TNA had a guest appearance from someone from one of the hottest (albeit shittest) shows in America, WWE had Peewee Herman (wonder if he had a wank in the audience of this one?). As a gimmick, the casting is great, both Becky Bayliss and Robbie E are convincing as annoying Jersey Shore types, and the mini-feud between Cookie and J-Wow from the Jersey Shore show only served to cement that. Though they are annoying, at least TNA are trying to be relevant to a modern audience.

Impact

If you can get past the first half hour of Bischoff et al talking themselves up, this wasn’t a bad Impact. A lot of the matches were screw-job matches or handicap matches which favoured Fourtune (Joe versus Gunner and Murphy had a run-in by Jeff Jarrett.) Stevie Richard versus AJ was surprisingly good, the others matches weren’t bad, they just stunk of NWO.
Putting Jeff Hardy over as a heel is clearly not working, but at least he came out wearing a suit this week (that’s how you know he’s a bad guy).

WWE Raw

I only watch Raw now, I can’t be bothered with Smackdown, and I certainly can’t be bothered with NXT or Superstars. I was in the audience for the last Raw (filmed in Manchester) and my experience of it is a little mixed. It was fun to be there, bu when there were commercials breaks, the matches would literally stop as the wrestlers stood and waited for the programme to air again.
WWE aren’t making anywhere near as much money as they used to and Linda McMahon didn’t win her election, so shouldn’t WWE take stock and sort their shit out? The PG thing clearly isn’t meeting the financial projections and come next Wrestlemania, what is going to be WWE’s draw for the event? Taker is hurting and is in and out of surgery every few months, Shaun Michaels has retired... what are we going to have? Wade Barrett versus Cena?

UFC 121 – Lesnar versus Velasques

I’ve never been arsed about MMA, but I ended up watching the last UFC this week with a mate. One the whole, the fights were pretty dull, but the main event with Lesnar was stunning. Both the fighters were relentless and Lesnar got beat by TKO. I’m still not convinced by UFC, but I really did enjoy that last match.

WCW Nitro – October/November 1996

It’s amazing how quick I can get through an episode of Nitro when I fast forward past the crap. I only watch the Cruiserweight matches and have been intrigued by the NWO stuff. I’ve read all about the NWO stuff before, but thought I needed to watch it for myself, and I have to say that the way it has built up was very well-executed, and I’m sure that, for a while at least, the angle was believable. I’m at the point now where Bischoff has just joined the NWO, and a main event has been signed for Hogan versus Piper. WCW’s main events were shit. Hogan/Macho Man/Lex Luger/The Giant... but the undercard was excellent and I don’t think it has been equalled. The Cruiserweight division had a real international feel to it, and some of the matches were fantastic. Dean Malenko/Ultimo Dragon/Psychosis/Rey Mysterio/Jushin Liger/Chris Jericho/Juventud Guerrera/Eddie Guerrero are just some of the regulars and there is nothing like it today.