A review of all things Pro Wrestling. WWE Raw, Smackdown, NXT, TNA Impact, PWG, WCW, ECW, CZW, IWP, NWA, ROH and much more.
Features, reviews. Greatest matches and promos, worst matches and characters. Predictions and opinions.
Can you smell what the Sock is cooking?
I've just had a look at the results for the TNA number one contender's poll. I'm pretty pleased with the results; hopefully TNA management with pay attention.
The results in order:
Total Votes: 497,682.
The first thing to say is congratulations to Desmond Wolfe, he deserves a push. Hopefully, this will stop TNA from treating him as a midcard wrestler. Also, I'd love to see how Wolfe and RVD's styles would work together in the ring. In fact the top three I completely agree with (though is there much point in pushing Hardy with possible jail time looming?).
Secondly, and thank God I'm not the only one feeling this, but Abyssamania really isn't running wild. The fact that Abyss scored the least number of votes goes to show how out of touch Hogan is. It's funny really; TNA is aimed at an older demographic that WWE, but yet they have an angle about a magic ring. Hopefully this will mark an end to Abyss being given far too much air time and get him to do what he does best (i.e. rip off Mick Foley).
Thirdly, I don't get who voted for the big Welsh steroid machine Rob Terry. This really baffles me: he can't wrestle, he looks all weird and out of proportion and he's shit on the mic. Its clear that TNA are trying to give him a Goldberg style dominant freak schtick but it just doesn't wash. I thought the business had done away with roid chompers after Hogan testified about the WWF and steroids... maybe he's not on roids, maybe he just spends a lot of time in the gym, drinking his milk and taking his vitamins, maybe.
Let's hope that Wolfe-a-mania starts running wilde.
I've never really rated Matt Morgan and since his feud with Kurt Angle has pretty much neen pushed down the card as a singles wrestler. Recently, I've really started to enjoy Matt Morgan's storyline. After 'injuring' his tag-team partner Hernadez, Morgan's character has taken an interesting turn and is an example of good writing in pro wrestling.
Matt Morgan is now a dominant force in TNA; the fact that he refers to himself as 'we' (is this the Royal we? or does Morgan have some mental illness? perhaps its because he sees himself as such a dominant force) is a smart move. With a nod to the Rock talking about himself in the third person, 'we' adds some great ambiguity to Morgan's character which moves him from a one dimensional prick to a character worth attention.
I think it's probably the attention to detail which makes this angle work, and I hope that TNA writers continue to play it well. When the angle first began to develop, it looked like Morgan would get a tag partner for a week, then beat down on him when the match was won, thus retaining the titles for himself. But, the angle with Jesse Neal and Shannon Moore has thrown some complexity into this and has turning it into a great heel storyline.
Looking forward to this week's Impact to see how it develops.
Go on any internet wrestling forum and there will be some fanboys banging on about how great the Attitude era was, how great it was when Steve Austin would come to the ring in various modes of transport. "Oh look, mummy, the bad man's in a beer truck", they write, without any sense of guilt or shame. Personally, I thought Austin was a one trick pony, which I why I've chosen this promo to share. As a parody of Austin's beer truck shananigans, Kurt Angle brings out a milk truck and covers Austin and his pals with some milky goodness.
I think what makes this clip particular awesome is JR's commentary; no one calls it like JR.
With the Draft on Monday pulling most of Smackdown's talent towards Raw, I knew that this episode would be a precursor to what can only be the demise of Smackdown. Smackdown's always played second fiddle to Raw, but has always maintained a stable of decent stars. With the Draft sending Edge and Jericho to Raw and replacing them with the likes of Christian and Kofi Kingston (you know the one who is from West Africa and seems to be proud of his Jamaican heritage whilst speaking with an obviously American accent).
Apparently, Smackdown is to move from it usual channel in the US to SyFy, which is where WWE's bastardised version of ECW was until this year and where the biggest example of a missed opportunity resides in the NXT borefest. It's quite obvious that WWE are moving their biggest pulls over to Raw before Smackdown gets demoted further in October.
I thought that this week's show had a lot of potential, on paper anyway. After all, the stars who had been drafted to Raw are still on Smackdown until Monday, but the stars from Raw had already moved across. In this unique crossover event we saw great moments that will stand like lighthouses in the stomy waters of wrestling history... well, not quite.
Does anybody else remember when Jericho used to be good? I'm pretty sure he's been in the business a few years, won a few matches, earned a few belts... so why the fuck was he a jobber for Kofi Kingston? It seems he can hold his ground with someone like Edge in a steel cage, but can't beat a mediocre 'superstar' like Kingston?
The rest of the episode was equally dull, with Punk being interupted by MVP who wants to bring the party back to Smackdown. Big Show was throwing a few punches, knocking a few people out, as you do, and for some reason became number one contender for no real reason. Throughout the night we got to see little vignettes of Jack Swagger talking about how great he is - he went to university and was really good in scouts. I'm getting tired of this lispy, arrogant prick; I don't dislike him because he's a heel, I dislike him because he's a complete ball bag. I loved to see him get punched by Big Show, it made such a great noise, I hope it really hurt him.
The highlight of the night was seeing Edge and Christian back in the ring together. Unfortunately, there was no death defying leaps from ladders, just a nice old fashioned mic spot. Edge was saying how much he loves Smackdown and how much he loves the fans and how he doesn't want to go. All really emotional stuff, Edge is such a great guy. Then Christian comes out and accuses Edge of being a liar. Edge can't be a liar, he such a great guy (see above). In perhaps the least shocking turn in wrestling history, Edge admits to being a liar and hating everything that he just said he liked, "you didn't see that coming, did you?", he said pulling his best heel face... well actually, Edge, if that is your real name, we did see that coming and most fans have wanted you to go heel since your return. And the award for the least convinced heel turn 2010 goes to...
So, with Smackdown pretty much redundant and Raw looking in better shape, I'm hoping over the coming months that CM Punk, Undertaker and Brian Danielson go over and all of the rest of Smackdown roster drift into obscurity (that includes you Rey Mysterio).
Whilst I welcome The Nature boy to TNA, despite my screen name I am getting a little tired of seeing his blood. More to the point, given the fact that he's now entitled to a bus pass I just wonder how much blood he can afford to lose before he turns an even funnier colour and falls over with a rather gravelly 'Woooooooo'.
In the following clip from WWE, he shows the world what he's good at - microphone wrestling and bleeding.
Messy!
I think that Mr. Flair is one of, if not the greatest microphone wrestlers of all time but that's how it should stay. His matches when they occur are nothing special as you would expect from a man who is the ripe old age of 61. Perhaps he should stay out of the ring unless he's keeping his suit on and planning to do what he's the master of.
I hasten to add that as far as promo's go for sheer solo quality this one is up there
When I started this blog, I never thought that I'd feel the need to write a post about a wrestler's body part; but here we are.
What the hell is going on with Ric Flair's forehead? Seriously, this guy can bleed on command and it's starting to creep me out. I had a dream last night where my dog Watson was actually a robot and for no reason Ric Flair kept bleeding everywhere. Now, I'm sure that Freud would have a field day with this dream, but Ric Flair needs to stop.
I used to know this guy whose dad was in the police and he told me about this rent boy they once took in. When they searched him they realised that he had a tampon stuffed in his arse. Police being police, they made the guy throw it away, much against the guy's protests. The cell the next morning looked like a magical chocolate factory, but instead of the floor being covered in chocolate... well you can guess the rest. Apparently, the rent boy didn't do this as a dirty protest, but had had his anus pounded so much over the previous years that he no longer had the capacity to control his bowels. There's a point to this, trust me.
With Ric Flair busting open his forehead every week, I worry that one he's going to be like the rent boy and no longer be able to control his explosive bleeding. Picture the scene, Ric Flair's in a bar with his wrestling buddies, probably bitching on someone for being gay until they leave the company, and suddenly his head explodes. There is blood everywhere and people start slipping on it. Fights break out, glasses and bottles are brken and shards of glass scatter across the floor and everyone is rolling around getting covered in Ric Flair's blood and getting ripped up by the glass. All the king's horses and all the king's men wouldn't be able to fix Ric and would have spend his life with a tampon sticking out of his forehead.
Take care Ric, it's only a matter of time.
