TNA Sacrfice predictions revisited

It's time to look at the results for TNA's latest PPV and see how I did in the predictions game:

TNA World Heavyweight Championship
Rob Van Dam vs. Sting

“Eugh, I remember how bad their last one-on-one match was. Sting and RVD are both ‘veterans’ which means they are both clunky in the ring. Their styles don’t work well together, and I predict that this match will suck. Sting to win.”

Sting won, thus I win. No one won really though, as this match was pretty dull. As noted above, both these guys are pretty limited in what they can do, so this saw RVD taking a few stupid bumps on the concrete floor and smash his leg off a steel barricade. During the match Anderson was on commentary and boy did he suck. He chewed gum loudly and whined like a bitch – he added nothing to this match. Next PPV we have Sting versus Anderson – I’m already feeling sleepy.

Match rating: *


TNA World Tag Team Championship
Matt Hardy & Chris Harris vs. Beer Money

“Not sure how this one’s going to pan out – Beer Money are awesome and both Hardy and Harris have been awesome... but that was a few years ago... so who knows? Beer Money should win.”

This match was average. Beer Money were great, but Harris was by no means in ring-shape. Hardy worked really hard at the start of the match, but the crowd weren’t into it. I think TNA went into this one assuming that the crowd would be all over the AMW/Beer Money angle; but without much of a build and due to the fact that most of the audience probably weren’t watching TNA when AMW were rocking the set, there was no heat - even ending the match with AMW’s finish failed to stir the crowd. Perhaps if this match had occurred 3 years ago it would have worked... at least Beer Money won, which means I’m 2-0 up.
Match rating: **


TNA Knockouts Championship
Madison Rayne vs. Mickie James

“The stip in this match makes little sense if, like I, you try and follow a storyline. Essentially, Tara was fired from TNA, she was working as a toilet cleaner (or something equally menial), so Madison Rayne employed her as a personal assistant/bodyguard. Months went by and Tara ended up costing Mickie James a title, which Tera then gave to Rayne in a finger poke of death style pin... Mickie James is now saying that if she beats Rayne, she will give Tera her old job back... how? Since when does Mickie have to power to hire people? And why would Mickie want to help Tera anyway? It just doesn’t make sense.... Mickie to win.”

It was weird to see that Tera had been replaced by a Jerry Springer transvestite in this one – she looked really bad. The match was what it was, bloody awful. The match has been built on the premise that Tera wants to be free at last, free at last... but, in the promo before that match, Tera was torn, seemingly just so Russo could write in a swerve. The match ended with Tera getting Madison’s loaded glove and standing in the ring after a second ref bump... for a long time... she was torn as to what to do, just in case you didn’t realise. For a moment it looked like she was going to hit Mickie... but bang! Swerve city, she turns and hits Madison. Mickie retained and Tera’s no longer a white slave. 3-0 to me!

Rating: *


TNA X-Division Championship
Max Buck vs. Kazarian

“Kaz to win and Bucks to reform... should be one hell of match.”
This was a decent enough match, lots of crazy spots and one of the stupidest moves I’ve ever seen. Kaz nearly killed Buck by doing a Sunset Flip Powerbomb from the apron to the floor. This move is dangerous enough at the best of times, but Max Buck’s head smacked off of the concrete. This looked really bad, and, fair play to him he kept working and even kicked out of a pin... just a few months after the concussion storyline, I might add... Kaz got the win and finished with the Shining Wizard, which is always a fun move. One the whole this was a pretty decent match, which felt a bit too choreographed at points. 4-0, I’m hating that I’m thinking like Russo.

Match rating: ***

Kurt Angle & Chyna vs. Jeff Jarrett & Karen Jarrett

“Who cares anymore? Chyna came out looking like Michael Jackson, Kurt Angle’s been beaten by Jarrett over and over since last year... I presume that Chyna get the pin on Karen for the victory. It will be a decent match whilst Kurt and Jarrett are in the ring, but then it will suck when the women tag in...”

I thought that the booking of this match was surprisingly good. Jeff and Kurt worked most of this one. Chyna looked like Michael Jackson and, luckily, her and Karen were only in the match for the finish. There was a bit of dumb moment in this match where Angle tagged Chyna, the announcers noted that it was a mixed tag match, so if one person tagged out, both sides had to switch. This didn’t happen. Chyna came in the ring, Karen didn’t and then Jeff and Kurt carried on. The announcers then explained that Jeff was the legal man, so that was fine... erm, no he wasn’t. The finish came with Chyna giving the worst slam I’ve ever seen to Jeff and then putting Karen in the ankle lock. Angle held Karen’s hand so she couldn’t tap, because in order to submit in a match now you have to physically tap (so stupid)... aside from some stupidity, this was a great mixed tag match. I even guessed who got the win. 5-0

Match rating: ***


AJ Styles vs. Tommy Dreamer

“This could be a decent enough match... I’m predicting a win by Dreamer, but due to interference from Bubba... that makes logical sense to me, so it’s very unlikely to happen.”

Yes and yes. I’m reaching Goldberg levels of streakery here. This match was pretty dull. AJ looked pretty good, but Dreamer kind of hobbled around a bit and finished with the worst looking Piledriver ever after Bubba interfered and hit AJ with a chain. Bubba’s promo before this match was truly awesome, Bubba is the best heel in mainstream wrestling bar none. 6-0

Match rating: **

Mexican America vs. Ink, Inc.

“This will probably be an okay match, I quite like some of the stuff Ink Inc do, but Shannon Moore is nothing without the rest of 3 Count. I presume that Mexicool, or whatever they’re called will get the win.”

This match sucked. Shannon Moore did some cool stuff in this, but it wasn’t enough. Mex-Pac isn’t ready to be on TV, and Hernadez is nothing without Homicide. But, I picked the winner... thus I win. 7-0
Match rating: ½


Abyss vs. Crimson

“Crimson’s going to kill you... if Crimson doesn’t fuck Abyss up... well...”
This would have been a great match if it went on for 3-4 minutes rather than 10. The match was pretty dull. The best part about this was actually Abyss’s (babyface) promo he gave before the match, really intense. 8-0... this is getting awkward now.

Match rating: *½

Robbie E. vs. Brian Kendrick

“Wow, this feud has been building up for months, I can’t wait to see these guys finally get in the ring together... okay, where has this match come from, and why should anybody PAY for this match? No build whatsoever... I’m sure Kendrick will do some pretty cool spots, but Robbie E is awful... I want Kendrick to win, but that’s very unlikely... screw it, Kendrick to win...”

Kendrick’s robe makes him look like he’s in the KKK. Robbie E = bad Zack Ryder. This match is a great example of a clash of styles. Kendrick was all over the top ropes, lots of high-flying moves; Robbie was doing his kick kick punch punch thing. What was strange about this match is the fact the Kendrick’s first strike was a dropkick, and so was his finisher. 9-0.
Match rating: *½

On the whole this was a sub-par PPV. There were a couple of half-decent matches punctuated by bad ones.
I predicted the results of all of these matches, which probably makes me some kind of psychic master. I have the ability to see through logic ... I am Vince Russo.*

*disclaimer - I am not Vince Russo.

WWE - Extreme Rules - predictions

It's Extreme Rules time again... and we know that it won't live up to its name. Judging from the card the matches seem quite thin on the ground, so predictions shouldn't take too long:

John Cena vs. The Miz vs. John Morrison - WWE Championship Triple Threat Steel Cage Match

This could be quite a good match. I hope Morrison wins, I hope Cena doesn't. Based on that I'm sure Miz will retain.

Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio (World Heavyweight Championship Ladder Match)

Christian will win this one. I really can't see both titles going to Raw, but I've been wrong on stuff like this before.

Randy Orton vs. CM Punk (Last Man Standing Match)

This will probably be the best match of the night, I can see Punk losing again and taking a long holiday afterwards.

Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes (Falls Count Anywhere Match)

Not sure why they need a falls count anwhere match, but hey, why not? I'm thinking that Rhodes won at Mania, Mysterio won on Smackdown... Mysterio to win.

Jerry Lawler & Jim Ross vs. Michael Cole & Jack Swagger (Country Whipping Match)

Ah, a good ol' country whipping match... whatever that means. This will be shit, but Cole will probably win.

Layla vs. Michelle McCool (Loser Leaves WWE Match)

This seems to have come from nowhere, maybe it's because I don't really pay attention to Divas. Layla to win...

WWE Draft 2011 - predictions

It's draft time, and I have with Smackdown losing Edge, there really needs to a major shake-up.

Here's my suggestions:

John Cena to Smackdown

Bryan Danielson to Smackdown

Alberto Del Rio to Raw

Cody Rhodes to Raw

I'm predicting that Cena and Del Rio will win at the PPV and then the titles will switch brands... could be a great move.

Danielson is pretty much dead on Raw, a move to Smackdown to become a top babyface will be great for him.

Cody Rhodes' new gimmick is great, I'd love to see him on Raw.

Of course, the draft isn't such a big deal as it has been in the past due to a lot of cross-branded stuff on Raw.

TNA predictions revisited

I've watched Lockdown, and it was a mixed bag, but overall quite enjoyable.
"
LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH TNA WORLD TITLE
Mr. Anderson vs. champion "The Icon" Sting vs. RVD

Yawn, I don't want to see RVD and Anderson in the ring together ever again. This will be a shit match. Hope Sting retains."

Short and sweet, mediocre match. Sting retained. Most of the stuff in the this match seemed to be double finishers... double Mic Check... double Scorpion Death Drop... double Scorpion Death Lock (this was possibly the gayest looking move ever).


"LETHAL LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
Immortal vs. Fortune

The usual Wargames match, the feud has kind of fizzled out over the last month or so, and it will be the usual hot-spot cluster-fuck we get at every Lockdown. Fortune will win."

This was a decent Lethal Lockdown, really entertaining, AJ returned, all good.
Daniels did a crazy jump from the cage that was captured beautifully... Matt Hardy did the same just as the camera was cutting away. Let's hope he's not injured...


"LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
Jeff Jarrett vs. Kurt Angle

This is the match I'm looking forward to. It's the same stip as the Wolfe/Angle match... can't wait to see Angle kick Jarrett's ass."

Jarrett won, but it was great match. Angle is nuts, he took some crazy bumps in this and look like he nearly killed himself when getting powerbombed from the top rope and over rolling. Scary shit. Also, I'm pretty sure that Angle hit Jarrett with an RKO - probably because Orton did an Angle Slam at Mania.


"LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
Mickie James vs. champion Madison Rayne
(Mickie's Hair vs. Madison's Knockouts Title)

Who cares? Mickie will win"

The entrance music was longer than the match. Mickie won, but her arm looked pretty fucked.


"LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
Hernandez vs. Matt Morgan

Really? Is this feud still going on? I'm not even going to guess on this one I hate it so much."

Morgan won, and for a match between these two, it wasn't totally awful.


"LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
The Pope vs. Samoa Joe

Shit feud, potentially good match. Joe deserves better than he's been booked over the last couple of years. Joe to win."

Pretty decent match, loved seeing Pope getting a couple of muscle-busters... didn't like seeing Pope's bare ass... AND JOE WON CLEAN.


"LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
The X Division Xscape Match

This should be fun, Chris Sabin to win."

This was a pretty confusing match, lots of spots, Bucks look great, little Buck won.

"LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
Ink Inc vs. Crimson/Steiner vs. Jordan/Young vs. Magnus/Williams

Come on Brits!"

Steiner made this match pretty deent by a whole bunch of suplexes, apart from that, it was pretty forgettable. Ink Inc won.


This wasn't a bad PPV, a couple of matches stood out, but there was a real disconnect with the crowd, not sure whether is was poor acoustics or something, but they sounded dead.

TNA Lockdown - predictions

Hmm, I forgot about this one, even after watching the go home show on Impact.
Anyways, lets have look at my Lockdown predictions...

LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH TNA WORLD TITLE
Mr. Anderson vs. champion "The Icon" Sting vs. RVD

Yawn, I don't want to see RVD and Anderson in the ring together ever again. This will be a shit match. Hope Sting retains.


LETHAL LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
Immortal vs. Fortune

The usual Wargames match, the feud has kind of fizzled out over the last month or so, and it will be the usual hot-spot cluster-fuck we get at every Lockdown. Fortune will win.


LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
Jeff Jarrett vs. Kurt Angle

This is the match I'm looking forward to. It's the same stip as the Wolfe/Angle match... can't wait to see Angle kick Jarrett's ass.


LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
Mickie James vs. champion Madison Rayne
(Mickie's Hair vs. Madison's Knockouts Title)

Who cares? Mickie will win


LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
Hernandez vs. Matt Morgan

Really? Is this feud still going on? I'm not even going to guess on this one I hate it so much.


LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
The Pope vs. Samoa Joe

Shit feud, potentially good match. Joe deserves better than he's been booked over the last couple of years. Joe to win.


LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
The X Division Xscape Match

This should be fun, Chris Sabin to win.

LOCKDOWN CAGE MATCH
Ink Inc vs. Crimson/Steiner vs. Jordan/Young vs. Magnus/Williams

Come on Brits!

Not pumped for this at all. I usually look forward to Lockdown, but the booking on TNa of late has been pretty terrible.

Wrestlemania predictions revisited

This year's Wrestlemania was certainly a mixed bag - excellent matches, throwaway matches, non-existent matches, bad booking... somewhat disappointing, but made worth it by some quality wresting. Let's have a look at my predictions:

"1 Edge (with Christian) (c) vs. Alberto Del Rio (with Brodus Clay) Singles match for the World Heavyweight Championship.
This has a lot of potential, I predict Del Rio will win, and I’m hoping it will be a clean win. At worst, this will be a decent match, though I worry that with the inclusion of Brodus Clay at ring-side, there will be some bullshit booking... or maybe not, I forget that this is WWE and not TNA, so I’m optimistic."

Man, DelRio was buried in this one. It was a great match, especially the last couple of minutes. Good opener, shame DelRio didn't win though. For a world title match on PPV a though, there was nothing out of the ordiary. I was very suprised that this was the opener.

Match rating: ***


"2 The Miz (c) vs. John Cena Singles match for the WWE Championship
Does anyone really give a shit about this match? I’ve written on this blog before that Miz is not a convincing champion. On last weeks Raw he said something along the lines of “I’m more imposing than Andre the Giant, I’m a better technical wrestler that Bret Hart, I’m a better athlete that Shawn Michaels...” etc. I’m pretty sure that the reaction they wanted from this promo wasn’t a universal “are you fuck”. If I were to book Miz as a champion, I would have have him say the opposite, that he’s not as good as any of these guys, but that he will keep hold of the title because he’s smart and will bend the rules to keep it. He could win by count-outs, getting himself DQed, etc. Granted he would lose the matches, but he would keep the title, which to him would be the most important thing. Over time, this will lead to fans really wanting to see a top babyface like Cena kick his ass and win the title. It’s an old school way of booking, but it would create a heel who is lamentable, and not just an after –thought. Should be a decent match though. Cena will win, and I am sure the Rock will raise his hand and Rock Bottom the Miz."

The booking of this match was terrible, it felt like a bad TNA PPV ending. Replace the Rock with Bischoff and picture what happened again - it's bullshit booking and you know it. This was a bad match, Cena was booed out of the house and the crowd hated the ending. Miz won because of a screwjob courtesy of the Rock. They then had the Rock bear the shit out of the Miz, just to make him look like the biggest pussy ever - exactly what you want in your champion.

"3 Triple H vs. The Undertaker No Holds Barred match
I can’t wait for this match, not because it will be a brilliant match (I’m sure it will be very good), but because it will hopefully mean the end of long boring promos from Triple H. Undertaker to win."

This was an awesome match, and was by far the best match of the evening. Taker won, but my God he earned it. This match was intense, the selling and ring psychology alone made this absolutely compelling to watch - the younger guys on the roster could learn a lot from watching this. The story of this match was fantastic, and the ending was brilliant, I even thought for a split second that Triple H was going going to win. When Undertaker kicked out of the Tombstone, I couldn't believe it. This was the only match on the card that felt like an awesome Wrestlemania match. Going into this, I wasn't sure how good it would be, but I'm glad it supassed my expectations. A classic.

Match rating: *****

"4 Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole (with Jack Swagger) Singles match with special guest referee Stone Cold Steve Austin.
This is a classic Wrestlemania style match, and I can’t wait to see it. It’s not going to be the best wrestling match, but it’s going to be entertaining. There’s no way this can be as bad as the clusterfuck of a Bret Hart match last year, and the build up has been spectacular. Lawler to win, Cole to get a Stunner."

This match was far too long. Cole clearly couldn't wrestle, the match was funny and Michael Cole look ridiculous, but it wasn't promoted as a comedy match. This should have been a five minute squash match with Stone Cold stunnering Cole. Then there was a screwjob and Cole won. This will no doubt lead to a second match... I think this match has killed the feud for me. It was better than the Bret Hart match of last year, but it was still pretty bad... Booker T got stunnered at the end, so that was good.

Matchrating: *

"5 Randy Orton vs. CM Punk Singles match
This feud reminds me of TNA style feud, and I’m pretty sure that this match was meant to be CM Punk versus Cena. In basic terms, a heel wants to get revenge on a babyface who kicked him and his friends in the head, and had cost Punk his title. Unless this match ends with a double turn, I’m not sure who the fans are meant to cheer for. I will, of course, be cheering for Punk, though I predict a win for Orton... boo!"

Again, this was a good match, but it felt a bit like a rerun of the spots they did on Raw. Again, this didn't feel like a Wrestlemania match, but it was solid.

Match rating: ***

"6 Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes Singles match
The build-up to this match has been the highlight of Smackdown. Though much of the feud has been lifted from the El Generico/Kevin Steen feud, it has still be great and Rhodes’ new persona is great. Let’s hope they keep it going and never go back to him being “dashing”... because that sells PPVs, right? Mysterio to win, and I’m pretty sure it will be a very good match."

This was a really well-worked match, but again, there was nothing out of the ordinary. It was a very good match, but still it didn't have that Wrestlemania feel to it... it was almost as if they had been told not to steal the show... I really liked the finish to this one, but it wasn't a blowaway match.

Match rating: ***

"7 Trish Stratus, Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi and John Morrison vs. Dolph Ziggler and LayCool (Layla and Michelle McCool) (with Vickie Guerrero) 6-person mixed tag team match
Another classic Wrestlemania style match. I can’t wait to go and get a drink while this is on. I hope that most of the match will be Morrison and Ziggler going at it. I’m sure the match will end with Snooki getting Vicky G to tap out."

Short but sweet, Snooki did some crazy-ass flips and got the pin on Michelle pretty quickly. Throwaway match, but entertaining.

Match rating: **

"8 Sheamus (c) vs. Daniel Bryan Singles match for the United States Championship
This is the match I want to see. I can see Sheamus winning, but it will be an excellent match. I can’t wait!"

FUCKING HELL - I was really pumped for this match, they were even advertising it on the pre-show, and then, erm, nothing. They'd apparently had it as a dark match, a fucking dark match! I'm furious about this. This was the tipping point for me actually buying this PPV. If they were injured, fair enough - but they weren't. If they ran short of time, cut the skits with Hornswaggle, and the video packages, and John Cena's choir entrance, or the throwaway Kame match... grrr...

9 Kane, Big Show, Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov vs. The Corre (Wade Barrett, Ezekiel Jackson, Justin Gabriel and Heath Slater) 8-man Tag Team match
Who gives a shit? This will be awful. I’m pretty sure that Kane et al will win... and no one will care.

Short but shit - waste of time.

Match rating: *

Wrestlemania predictions

It’s Wrestlemania in less than a week, so it’s time for some predictions. The build-up for this year’s Wrestlemania has been great, and there are some quite decent looking matches on the card... there are others that are not so great... Let’s do this!

1 Edge (with Christian) (c) vs. Alberto Del Rio (with Brodus Clay) Singles match for the World Heavyweight Championship.
This has a lot of potential, I predict Del Rio will win, and I’m hoping it will be a clean win. At worst, this will be a decent match, though I worry that with the inclusion of Brodus Clay at ring-side, there will be some bullshit booking... or maybe not, I forget that this is WWE and not TNA, so I’m optimistic.


2 The Miz (c) vs. John Cena Singles match for the WWE Championship
Does anyone really give a shit about this match? I’ve written on this blog before that Miz is not a convincing champion. On last weeks Raw he said something along the lines of “I’m more imposing than Andre the Giant, I’m a better technical wrestler that Bret Hart, I’m a better athlete that Shawn Michaels...” etc. I’m pretty sure that the reaction they wanted from this promo wasn’t a universal “are you fuck”. If I were to book Miz as a champion, I would have have him say the opposite, that he’s not as good as any of these guys, but that he will keep hold of the title because he’s smart and will bend the rules to keep it. He could win by count-outs, getting himself DQed, etc. Granted he would lose the matches, but he would keep the title, which to him would be the most important thing. Over time, this will lead to fans really wanting to see a top babyface like Cena kick his ass and win the title. It’s an old school way of booking, but it would create a heel who is lamentable, and not just an after –thought. Should be a decent match though. Cena will win, and I am sure the Rock will raise his hand and Rock Bottom the Miz.

3 Triple H vs. The Undertaker No Holds Barred match
I can’t wait for this match, not because it will be a brilliant match (I’m sure it will be very good), but because it will hopefully mean the end of long boring promos from Triple H. Undertaker to win.

4 Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole (with Jack Swagger) Singles match with special guest referee Stone Cold Steve Austin.
This is a classic Wrestlemania style match, and I can’t wait to see it. It’s not going to be the best wrestling match, but it’s going to be entertaining. There’s no way this can be as bad as the clusterfuck of a Bret Hart match last year, and the build up has been spectacular. Lawler to win, Cole to get a Stunner.

5 Randy Orton vs. CM Punk Singles match
This feud reminds me of TNA style feud, and I’m pretty sure that this match was meant to be CM Punk versus Cena. In basic terms, a heel wants to get revenge on a babyface who kicked him and his friends in the head, and had cost Punk his title. Unless this match ends with a double turn, I’m not sure who the fans are meant to cheer for. I will, of course, be cheering for Punk, though I predict a win for Orton... boo!

6 Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes Singles match
The build-up to this match has been the highlight of Smackdown. Though much of the feud has been lifted from the El Generico/Kevin Steen feud, it has still be great and Rhodes’ new persona is great. Let’s hope they keep it going and never go back to him being “dashing”... because that sells PPVs, right? Mysterio to win, and I’m pretty sure it will be a very good match.

7 Trish Stratus, Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi and John Morrison vs. Dolph Ziggler and LayCool (Layla and Michelle McCool) (with Vickie Guerrero) 6-person mixed tag team match
Another classic Wrestlemania style match. I can’t wait to go and get a drink while this is on. I hope that most of the match will be Morrison and Ziggler going at it. I’m sure the match will end with Snooki getting Vicky G to tap out.

8 Sheamus (c) vs. Daniel Bryan Singles match for the United States Championship
This is the match I want to see. I can see Sheamus winning, but it will be an excellent match. I can’t wait!

9 Kane, Big Show, Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov vs. The Corre (Wade Barrett, Ezekiel Jackson, Justin Gabriel and Heath Slater) 8-man Tag Team match
Who gives a shit? This will be awful. I’m pretty sure that Kane et al will win... and no one will care.

On the whole, this is a pretty damn good Wrestlemania card which is punctuated with some throwaway matches presumably to give you time to get your breath back between the decent matches.

TNA Victory Road - predictions revisited...

This was not a good PPV, there were some decent enough matches, but with some terrible booking and quite a few stupid endings, this made for frustrating viewing. Anyway, let's see how I did:

WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE
Jeff Hardy vs. (c) Sting


"Hardy will get the strap back and the match will be Sting by numbers... pretty sure Hardy will go through the motions. Mediocre match to be expected."


Sting retained in a main event that was about a minute and a glaf long. This was bullshit and I really feel sorry for US fans who had to pay to watch this. A bit of advice for TNA: DON'T GIVE YOUR TOP BELT TO A GUY WHO CAN NO LONGER MOVE. There was beautiful WCW moment when Sting was leaving when a fan shouted "that was bullshit" and Sting shrugged and said: "I agree".

Match rating: *

FIRST BLOOD MATCH
Hernandez vs. Matt Morgan

"Is this feud still going on? Can't wait to see this! Flip a coin: Morgan. Another mediocre match."

Mediocre would have been much better than this bag of shit. The match was rubbish all the wat through until a "fan" ran in and beat up the ref, the "fan" then left a bottle of red food colouring for Hernadez to throw on Morgan... so fucking stupid.

Match rating: *

#1 CONTENDER MATCH
Mr. Anderson vs. Rob Van Dam

"See Hardy vs Sting, but replace the names with RVD and Anderson... RVD to win."

My God, this match was terrible. It didn't go anywhere, they fucked up about a dozen times and they both looked like they were about to laugh. I can't emphasise enough how bad this was... then we get to the ending: a double countout. At this point half of the crowd were chanting: "Restart the match!" whilst the rest of the crowd were shouting "No!" in response - they knew they had seen a bad match.


Matt Hardy vs. AJ Styles

"This match has potential, but I don't hold out much hope for it in all honesty. If Matt's on form they should be able to pull something decent out their ass. AJ to win."

This was a very good match, Matt Hardy worked like he was actually on a PPV. This was easily the best match of the night, even though it wasn't a great match by any means. AJ won with a Spiral Tap... AJ's not done that one for an age.

Match rating: ***1/2

ULTIMATE X MATCH FOR THE X TITLE
Jeremy Buck vs. Max Buck vs. (c) Kazarian vs. Robbie E

"Love Ultimate X, don't see wwhy Robbie E gets another title shot after losing his last two. Would have been better if Lethal, Suicide or Amazing Red we in this... Kaz to win."

This was a pretty decent match, but compared with a lot of other Ultimate X matches, it's not one of the best. Kaz was great in this one and ended up getting the win by walking on the ropes to get the belt... and Kaz retained so that's good. Look out for Robbie E's title shot next week on Impact (wins and losses really don't matter in TNA).

Match rating: **1/2

TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP
Ink Inc vs. (c) Beer Money

"This might be the match of the night. Beer Money to win"

It wasn't the match of the night, but it was a good mathc. Not up to Beer Money's usual standard, but still pretty decent.

Match rating: ***

CHALLENGE MATCH
Bully Ray vs. Tommy Dreamer

"I'm sure Tommy will do something stupid and get really hurt in this. Bubba to win."

This was like every hardcore match I've ever seen... and for some reason there was sex doll that came into play. The match ended with Dreamer getting the win (though only once Devon got involved and Bubba got 3Ded through a table. Just a quick note: YOU DO NOT GET A ROPE BREAK IN A FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE MATCH.

Match rating: *

KNOCKOUTS TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP
Sarita & Rosita vs. (c) Angelina Love & Winter

"Angelina Love is getting skinnier and skinnier, she's lile two tits pinned onto a stick... it's not a nice look. Winter on the other hand would definitely get it.

X-ita to win."

I was right on the result, and boy was this a bad bad match, even in terms of bad women's matches, this was fucking horrible. The ending was confusing and stupid. There was a spot where Winter got Rosita rolled up, there was some interference and Rosita got Winter rolled up. The ref was out of position, so for about 10 seconds they were frozen in position waiting for the count. Considering that Winter's legs are almost as long a Rosita, I'm not conviced that a skinny little 4'11" thing could seriously hold Winter down for that long.

Match rating: *

There were far too many terrible matches on this PPV. If I had paided for this PPV I would demand my money back. I'm looking forward to Raw.

TNA Victory Road - predictions

As rightly pointed out by Clown, WWE is on fire at the minute, although the suggestion that John Cena would like to give the Rock a pearl necklace is somewhat disturbing. On the other end f the spectrum, we have out latest TNA PPV - the card doesn't inspire confidence.

WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE
Jeff Hardy vs. (c) Sting

Hardy will get the strap back and the match will be Sting by numbers... pretty sure Hardy will go through the motions. Mediocre match to be expected.

FIRST BLOOD MATCH
Hernandez vs. Matt Morgan

Is this feud still going on? Can't wait to see this! Flip a coin: Morgan. Another mediocre match.

#1 CONTENDER MATCH
Mr. Anderson vs. Rob Van Dam

See Hardy vs Sting, but replace the names with RVD and Anderson... RVD to win.

Matt Hardy vs. AJ Styles

This match has potential, but I don't hold out much hope for it in all honesty. If Matt's on form they should be able to pull something decent out their ass. AJ to win.

ULTIMATE X MATCH FOR THE X TITLE
Jeremy Buck vs. Max Buck vs. (c) Kazarian vs. Robbie E

Love Ultimate X, don't see wwhy Robbie E gets another title shot after losing his last two. Would have been better if Lethal, Suicide or Amazing Red we in this... Kaz to win.

TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP
Ink Inc vs. (c) Beer Money

This might be the match of the night. Beer Money to win

CHALLENGE MATCH
Bully Ray vs. Tommy Dreamer

I'm sure Tommy will do something stupid and get really hurt in this. Bubba to win.

KNOCKOUTS TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP
Sarita & Rosita vs. (c) Angelina Love & Winter

Angelina Love is getting skinnier and skinnier, she's lile two tits pinned onto a stick... it's not a nice look. Winter on the other hand would definitely get it.

X-ita to win.

Plus, The Jarretts go on their honeymoon after renewing their vows!

This will be great... maybe not.

WWE Elimination Chamber predictions revisited

The Elimination Chamber is one of my favourite gimmick matches, and this PPV did not disappooint. Let's see how I did, I've got a pretty good feeling about this one:

"-- WWE champion The Miz vs. Jerry Lawler for the WWE Title.

Miz. This match will be decent enough, but very old school. I can see Cole helping the Miz get the win (again), thus leading to some kind of Cole/Lawler match at Wrestlemania to rival Mr McMahon vs. Bret Hart at WM 26 for stinker of the decade."

Miz won, but with a clean victory. The match was very good, old school, but very good. Before the match Lawler did an awesome promo which actually made the title seem like it actually meant something for the first time in God knows how long. I'm glad they are giving Miz some clean victories over credible opponents, they've booked Miz pretty badly over the last year, and I think they are only just starting to book him as a champion.

Match rating: ****

"-- Smackdown Elimination Chamber match - World Hvt. Title match: World champion Edge vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Kane vs. Wade Barrett vs. Drew McIntyre. One slot vacated.

So Ziggler's going to come back in and Edge will retain. Simple."

Okay, so Ziggler didn't make a comeback tonight, but Edge did win. I really enjoyed this Elimination Chamber match, I actually think that this was slightly better than the Raw one, the last ten minutes were particularly good.

Match rating: ****1/2


"-- Raw Elimination Chamber match - #1 contender match to WWE Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton vs. C.M. Punk vs. John Morrison vs. Sheamus vs. R-Truth.

It's going to be Cena, though I'd like to see Punk headline WM, that ain't gonna happen any time soon."

This was another great EC match. There were some pretty cool spots in this one, and all the guys (except maybe Orton) worked their asses off and used the cage to do some pretty cool spots, and some stupid ones it must be said. There was one spot where Morrison scaled the cage, right up to the middle of the roof, and then he just kind of dropped down on Sheamus, who had been waiting to catch him for almost a minute. I though that Morrison would have done something a bit more interesting here, and maybe he was meant to. A lot of the stuff was highlight reel material, and when you saw the nasty bruises developing on Punk and Sheamus, you knew that they were putting their bodies on the line in this one.

Match rating: ****

"-- #1 contender Alberto Del Rio vs. IC champion Kofi Kingston.

Is this for the IC belt? Kofi loses pretty much every match he's in, and Del Rio needs to look strong on the run-up to WM, be stupid if Del Rio loses."

Del Rio won, and this was a great opener: fast-paced, quite a few near-falls. Del Rio won with his Cross Arm-breaker, so no suprises there, and the IC title wasn't mentioned once. It would have been cool for Del Rio to have the IC belt on the run-up to WM, but the title means less than the main ones, so I suppose it doesn't matter.

Match rating: ***

"-- WWE Unified tag champions Santino & Kozlov vs. Corre (Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater) for the WWE Tag Titles

PLEASE BE THE CORRE. I hate the Corre, I hate their name, I hate Heath Slater, I hate their gimmick (I think they are meant to be a communist Nexus)... but, if it means Santino and Koslov aren't champs, then I'm all for it... probably won't even watch this one."

The Corre won, and the match was sloppy. I really don't like watch Santino or Koslov in the ring, and I'm not convinced by Heath Slater. Michael Cole's started calling him 'the one-man rock band' - does this mean that he plays guitar, sings, and has a number of percussion instruments attached by strings to different parts of his body when he plays? I think it does.

Match rating: **

Overall, I really enjoyed this PPV. The matches (apart from the tag match) were great, the PPV was let down by stupid segments which should have been on Raw. When Trish Stratus came out and started doing Rock catchphrases only a week after the real Rock had come out and tore the house down with his promo on Raw, it seemed kind of lame... but Christian came back, so at least that's a plus. Booker T on commentary is also awful.

WWE Elimination Chamber - predictions

We are now officially on the road to Wrestlmania, and so far it's not looking brilliant. Fair enough the Rock is back, but all he has done is come out and give a great promo, but a promo which has served to show how fucking weak WWE is compared to the late 90s. Rock, Foley, DX, Stone Cold vs The Miz, John Cena, Randy Orton and The Corre... hmm... but at least there is a glimmer of hope; as far as I can tell this is the first WWE PPV in over a year which hasn't had Cena or Orton in a title match... let's hope this trend continues.

Anyway, let's look at what going down at Elimination Chamber:

-- WWE champion The Miz vs. Jerry Lawler for the WWE Title.

Miz. This match will be decent enough, but very old school. I can see Cole helping the Miz get the win (again), thus leading to some kind of Cole/Lawler match at Wrestlemania to rival Mr McMahon vs. Bret Hart at WM 26 for stinker of the decade.

-- Smackdown Elimination Chamber match - World Hvt. Title match: World champion Edge vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Kane vs. Wade Barrett vs. Drew McIntyre. One slot vacated.

So Ziggler's going to come back in and Edge will retain. Simple.

-- Raw Elimination Chamber match - #1 contender match to WWE Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton vs. C.M. Punk vs. John Morrison vs. Sheamus vs. R-Truth.

It's going to be Cena, though I'd like to see Punk headline WM, that ain't gonna happen any time soon.

-- #1 contender Alberto Del Rio vs. IC champion Kofi Kingston.

Is this for the IC belt? Kofi loses pretty much every match he's in, and Del Rio needs to look strong on the run-up to WM, be stupid if Del Rio loses.

-- WWE Unified tag champions Santino & Kozlov vs. Corre (Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater) for the WWE Tag Titles

PLEASE BE THE CORRE. I hate the Corre, I hate their name, I hate Heath Slater, I hate their gimmick (I think they are meant to be a communist Nexus)... but, if it means Santino and Koslov aren't champs, then I'm all for it... probably won't even watch this one.

And I think there's a Divas match... and it will be shit...

Against All Odds - predictions revisited...

So, I've had a fucking insanly busy week hence the no revisit on Against All Odds predictions. Anyways, it's good to see Clown back, it's been a while! So here it is, better late than never, also I've had almost a week for the matches to settle in my memory, and most of them didn't...

"-- TNA World Hvt. champion Mr. Anderson vs. Jeff Hardy in a ladder match for the TNA World Title.
Depending on how much Jeff Hardy can be arsed, this could be a pretty decent match, but in all likelihood will be over-booked and needlessly complicated. I think Anderson will keep the strap, Anderson is the lesser of two evils in this scenario."

This matches was crazy, both guys took some pretty nasty bumps and they both worked their asses off. The ending seemed botched and was a bit of an anti-climax, but Jeff won his stupid fucking belt back.

Match rating: ****


"-- Kurt Angle vs. Jeff Jarrett.
This match will be great, the build-up has been a mixed bag; I’m really not a fan of the soap opera elements. I thought the MMA Jarrett was a great gimmick, though I really can’t be doing with a worked fight. If the storyline had continued and Kurt just wanted to prove he could kick Jarrett’s ass without bring Karen and their kids into it, I would be marking out for this one. Why can’t they just have a straight match with no stipulations and no bullshit?
This match will clearly end with some kind of screwjob/DQ with Jarrett getting the victory."

Jarrett got the victory, and Angle should have won... many times... but this match was so over-booked that they must have gone through every possible match ending in Wrestling Booking for Dummies (the Dusty Rhodes edition). The in-ring stuff was great, but they are hinting at another Angle retirement angle... this is such a shit angle...

Match rating: ***


"-- Bully Ray vs. Brother Devon in a Street Fight.
This is where the bad booking comes into play. The idea of being against the odds plays into this one because it is essentially a handicap match with Devon’s two son’s being in Devon’s corner. So we have a 3-on-1 street fight with the heel working against the odds... we can’t cheer for the babyfaces because they’ve got an unfair advantage, and the heel is a heel... This match would have been 20 times better were it just a bog-standard street-fight, now it’s hard to get behind Devon... idiotic booking... also, because this is TNA Devon will either get DQed or counted out... in a street fight..."

Bubba is a great heel, he has no redeeming qualities, whatsover. I find with most heels (Chris Jericho is probably the only exception), heels always seem to win over the crowd, either with comedy, catchphrases, etc. but Bubba came accross as complete and utter cunt on this one. Match wasn't really a match, but more of an angle... another angle involving families, hmm... What I will also say about this match is how well Taz sold this. There is no way that Michael Cole could appear so inversted in the feud as Taz was in this...
and Bubba won.

Match rating: **1/2


"-- Samoa Joe vs. The Pope D'Angelo Dinero.
This might be the first PPV match Joe has been in since he was kidnapped by ninjas, and the feud has made very little sense. As far as I can gather Joe has hired Okada to follow and film Pope, Pope has turned heel and might be involved in dog-fighting, Pope then called Joe fat... erm, I think that pretty much covers it.
I don’t rate Pope in the ring, but it will be great to see Joe back in the ring. If Joe jobs for Pope I’ll be pissed. Joe to win."

Joe, a guy who is miscast as a babyface, made Pope, a miscast heel, tap-out. The match was dull and with Pope turning on Joe at the end, it made Joe look like a fucking idiot. I'm glad Joe Muscle Busted Pope through a pig on Impact.

Match rating: * 1/2

"-- Rob Van Dam vs. Matt Hardy.
If this match is 20 times better than the last RVD/Fat Lardy match it will still be shit, so I don’t hold up much hope for anything decent coming from this one. Though RVD is meant to be a babyface, his arrogance and his lacklustre performances have made me really dislike him, as for Lardy, I really couldn’t give a shit and so do not care about this match in the slightest.
Flip a coin, RVD to win."

RVD won, and it was 20 imes better than the last time they wrestled... meaning it was still shit, but not a stinker. The match was very slow to start, and RVD looks like he's hurting. In the last minute or so, they both looked pretty good. There's hope for them yet.

Match rating: ** 1/2


"-- Knockouts champion Madison Rayne vs. Mickie James in a Last Knockout Standing match for the Knockouts Title.
By my reckoning, this will be Madison Rayne’s fourth or fifth solo match in TNA, and she has been KO champ for months now. What a joke. Mickie to win, at least she can go."

I don't remember much about this one, I remember that they both crawled under the ring for a bit for no reason, and recall that the match was pretty dull. Madison retained due to her cheat glove.


"-- Scott Steiner & Beer Money vs. Gunner & Murphy & Rob Terry.
Is this match real? This match would be fine on Impact, but on PPV? Security guards and Terroid in a PPV? Jeez, no wonder people aren’t buying PPVs anymore. It will be the dumbest thing in the world for Beer Money and Steiner to job for Terroid et al, so I’ll have to go with Terroid et al for the win."

Rob Terry was used to a minimum, as was Steiner, who as a 50 year old pulled off a pretty awesome looking Frankensteiner for the victory. Beer Money were great and are now babyfaces, which means they can be awesome again, and my God, they managed to stop this match from being a stinker.

Match rating: ***

"-- Max Buck vs. Jeremy Buck vs. Robbie E. in a #1 contender match to the X Division Title.
AGAIN, what could have been a decent match is ruined by careless booking. The Young Bucks will obviously work together, they are heels after all, thus rendering it, for all intents and purposes, a handicap match... who’s our plucky babyface who’s going to win, who’s going to beat the odds and win through his heart and intestinal fortitude? Why Robbie E of course... not only is this guy a heel, but he has X-Pac heat, the fans genuinely hate him; they hate his gimmicks, his look, and his style is very middle of the road WWE style... kick, kick, punch, punch, signature slam, win... The Bucks are way more over than Robbie will ever be... and Robbie E will blatantly win and go on to beat Kaz... thus rendering the token gesture of injecting new life into the X-Division as being a completely pointless exercise."

This match didn't happen due to The Bucks being stuck in an airport... Robbie E won by default. Then Kaz came out and they had a mediocre title match with Kaz winning clean... and on the back of that clean loss, Robbie E got a rematch on the next Impact... how fucking stupid.

Match rating: **1/2


On the whole, this was a shoddy PPV. My view is that they need to stop fucking around with Joe and Angle... put them in a simple, decent feud, maybe against each other, FFS. Also, every time a former WWEer gets put over, it is like TNA are putting the WWE over. Idiots

TNA Genesis 2011 - predictions

Genesis is upon us and it's time for my predictions. My first prediction will be that this will have the feel of a WCW PPV with some great undercard matches and a piss-poor, overly booked main event. Let's do this...

- Rob Van Dam vs. Jeff Hardy's handpicked opponent.

One thing I've learnt in the last year is that in TNA the word 'mystery' is usually a synonym for 'shit' or 'disappointing'. I've heard rumours about Matt Hardy, but I don't think his 90 days are up yet. Expect such wonders as Rob Terry or Shannon Moore, maybe even Shaun Waltman. This match will suck and RVD will lose.

- Ken Anderson vs. Matt Morgan

Main event and it's a bag of shit. Expect a couple of side-slams, that spot where Morgan takes of his elbow pads and does some elbows to a guy on the turnbuckles, a Carbon Footprint, some kind of Bischoff screwjob and an overly complex ending. Anderson will no doubt win.

- Brother Ray vs. Brother Devon.

The Bully Ray gimmick might be one of the worst things that could have happened to the Dudleys. I can see Ray winning.

- Jeff Jarrett vs. Kurt Angle: MMA Exhibition.

The lead up to this has been pretty shit, though funny at points. This match will be great and Kurt Angle will hopefully kick Jarrett's ass.

- TNA X Division champion Jay Lethal vs. Kazarian.

I'm looking forward to this match; Lethal and Kaz are pretty inconsistant in the ring, so it could be a great match, or it could be a stinker. I'm sure Kaz will probably win this one.

- TNA TV champion AJ Styles vs. Douglas Williams.

I'm pretty psyched for this match. If they put on another great match, I'll be a happy guy. AJ will probably win, thought I would like to see Doug retain the title.

- TNA Knockouts champion Madison Rayne vs. Mickie James.

This will be a bad match, Mickie will win.

- TNA Tag Team champions MCMG vs. Beer Money.

I can't wait for this one. I can see Beer Money getting the strap though, probably due to a screw job.